©expat copenhagen - the new work surrounding as moving is getting closer, other things have to end. my carreer at BEHF Architects yet not old and yet not very successful will be over in 6 working - days. though it wasn't the work I'd die for it was a nice time and along that time many things changed. I think I grew older and that working relation in a strange way let me know what is and what's not my way of living! Of course there have been outstanding days like the opening of the beautiful EO Oberwart (pictures, movie), the little but always hidden success that after 100 types of façades they finally took my suggestion for a hotel in Salzburg and so on.
The not so nice, situations always disappear in time or at least we try to let them disappear. I think it's a kind of self-protection to not the bad things remain within your heart and mind. still these points let me change my future perspective and drew me to a new situation of leaving home for something I am very excited about. a new job, a new duty, a new role, a new life!
Yes I passed the status of half-heartedness, I passed it and I feel a little sad of leaving my home where I grew up, finished school, had many of one's first experiences and so,... Not that I haven't left home yet, I had half a year in Sydney, finding out how I am able to survive in the out(back)er world. But that time was completely different, it was a time where I always new that I'd be back some day!
Well I'd lie if I say that I never return to Vienna. I guess I will. Somehow in my head there is that wish to see it as a great move. maybe it's stupid maybe I'll regret it, maybe this or that. Telling how these feelings emerged would be hard, I just have no idea. But since a certain poing I've allowed it to be and it felt like a big step.
This time I spent with BEHF, put me into "real" business life, not that I was totally new to that having worked for several offices along uni & school since I was 16. Here it was different. It emerged through a real business application process (which I admired at that time) and it always had nothing to do with people I know before. Just realizing that this was never the case before with all the other places I spent my time with. Always it had something to do with a colleague or a friend or a friends-friend, or someone who know someone or,... simply there was always a personal relation. I just realized that this is something I've missed here and I never really got closer with someone here. (besides some nice colleagues, still colleagues)
I'd also lie if I'd say this will change. It can't, how would it. But I'll try to change. I'll try to find someone who's valuable to become a real friend not only beside the working desk. At least I can try. Else than that I have no idea how to really deal with my concerns. Maybe that's just the sad business life! I hope not and I still have the believe that it's possible to love not only what you do but also the circumstances it's in!
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